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22 August 2007 @ 11:52 pm
 


....um....help. Ted's going to teach me the ways of the muggles....um....tell me things so I don't look like a complete arse when I'm all wtf!why? PLEASE. I'll pay you back somehow.

Andy.
 
 
 
Lily Evanscall_a_lily on August 23rd, 2007 05:01 pm (UTC)
Andy,

Don't worry. I'll also try to make sure he doesn't break any bones or cause too much damage to the ginger he's kidnapped.

Just use the poker face thing. Pretend you know what's going on, and you can always send me an emergency owl if things look grim.

You're welcome,

Lily
Andromeda Blackchained_maid on August 23rd, 2007 05:11 pm (UTC)
Lily.

HE KIDNAPPED SOMEONE? MERLIN HELP ME.

Excellent...

Andy
Lily Evanscall_a_lily on August 23rd, 2007 05:17 pm (UTC)
Andy,

Yes. He's apparently kidnapped a ginger named "Billy." I am praying to God in Heaven that it is not a certain ginger name Bill Weasley, as I think Sirius would be killed by Molly. Or the Prewett brothers. It depends entirely on who gets there first.

Hope you enjoy yourself at Ted's. Oh, and if muggle sports are involved, such as football or rugby, admit that you don't know how to play. Or if you're forced to watch a game on the telly, be forewarned that this can be base torture. Men get all into it. Pretend you know the rules and just watch them for when to cheer/act outraged/swear at the referee/etc.

Hope everything is well at your new flat.

Lily
Andromeda Blackchained_maid on August 23rd, 2007 09:26 pm (UTC)
Lily,

I hope for everyone's sakes it's not Molly's kid either...

Are there usually games on at Christmas?

It's wonderful. Painting was squiffy, but all fixed.

Andy
Lily Evanscall_a_lily on August 24th, 2007 12:02 am (UTC)
Andy,

I am terrified that it is. The child certainly does seem to fit the description.

I have no idea. The minute my father sits down at the telly I head in the opposite direction.

Glad everything is well and I hope your Christmas is lovely.

~Lily
Andromeda Blackchained_maid on August 24th, 2007 12:04 am (UTC)
Lily,

It is. He just told me. Don't let Molly or Fabigid kill him please.

Andy
Lily Evanscall_a_lily on August 24th, 2007 12:13 am (UTC)
Andy,

I've suggested that they compose their wills, as I am in no doubt of their imminent demise by enraged gingers. I will do my best, but these are, as we know, the Prewett brothers and they are very persuasive. Perhaps if we sneak little William back to his parents' house?

Very Concerned, though.

Lils
Andromeda Blackchained_maid on August 24th, 2007 12:16 am (UTC)
Lily,

They'll get out of it I'm sure. Though, it may be best to sneak him away during the night. Why are men not sensible?

Same.

Andy
Lily Evanscall_a_lily on August 24th, 2007 12:18 am (UTC)
Andy,

James was apparently unaware they had kidnapped a Weasley, or as they so charmingly put it, a "Weasle." Nutters, both of 'em.

I think if men were sensible, they would no longer be men. They would be women. Soon we shall become so much more intelligent and developed that we shall just keep men as our sex toys.

Still worried, and slightly deafer given James' reaction.

~Lils
Andromeda Blackchained_maid on August 24th, 2007 12:21 am (UTC)
Lily,

Oh lovely. My cousin and your boyfriend are going to be murdered by ginger Hufflepuffs.

Yes, I already use mine like that though, he's useless at conversation.

Now hoping Sirius left her something in his will

Andy
Lily Evanscall_a_lily on August 24th, 2007 12:24 am (UTC)
Andy,

Maybe if they return him under cover of darkness with a brand new cookbook endorsed by some outrageously good-looking celebrity, they'll only be ritualistically castrated....

James is witty enough to keep around for more than just the sex.

I think James left me everything. I WIN.

~Lils
Andromeda Blackchained_maid on August 24th, 2007 12:26 am (UTC)
Lily,

Get Padfoot to take him back. Charm him to say he was camping and found the dog etc...cover story.

Ted's wonderful to look at, but he's a Hufflepuff...he's still amused by badgers and Snape!rape.

Hm. Well done. What about his parents?

Andy
Lily Evanscall_a_lily on August 24th, 2007 12:29 am (UTC)
Andy,

Good idea. And James and I stumbled across the poor, lost child and decided to SAVE HIM. I shall give you some of the reward biscuits and such, since Molly's cooking is TO DIE FOR.

Surely he's not amused by such things amidst coitus?

I don't think his parents want to know what's going on.

~Lily
Andromeda Blackchained_maid on August 24th, 2007 12:33 am (UTC)
Lily,

Excellent. Could do with more food. London doesn't seem to have many food shops in this area.

Not yet...though he's not done it much bless him. He's amused by an awful lot though.

Ah. Probably for the best.

Andy